Page 30 - PartA
P. 30
Counselling Skills
! STOP AND THINK!
What could be the result of a person having boundaries that
are too enmeshed with others so that the boundaries become
inappropriate? Make notes in the space below.
Did you think about the following?
If inappropriate boundaries become the norm, a person may not be aware that they
are being violated in some way. They don’t know when to say ‘No’. This leaves them
open to abuse and being unable to recognise that they are being manipulated to
satisfy another person’s needs or wants. For example, vulnerable young people or
those with mental health conditions or learning disabilities may not recognise that
they are being abused sexually, physically or emotionally, because their sense of
boundaries has been distorted by people manipulating them.
Referring back to the analogy of boundaries in the home – a person with rigid
boundaries will not let anyone in and a person with enmeshed boundaries lets
everyone in. A person with healthy boundaries lets some people in – the people
whom they choose. They have a separate sense of ‘self’ and respect other people’s
sense of self and their boundaries – and don’t intrude on them. In other words,
they don’t enter someone’s home without being invited in.
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